The Lokan Rambler
You Won't Believe It
Vol. 1, Friday, May 20, 2016
Controversy saturated public chat last night as Hilo, Eldritch, Ibbish and others bickered over who had numbers advantages in battles going back to September of 2015. Amid labels like “You're a two-dollar whore of a liar,” “Your momma couldn't count a stack of zombie flesh,” and “You're as bad at remembering as you are at aiming your Sharpness V, Fire Aspect II, Looting III, Unbreaking III sword [aka “Bobby'sBoogersOfPain”],” there were serious claims set down.
Mopyc stated that he won ten of eleven battles against Elysium, one versus twenty, with nothing but a Bane-of-Arthropods-enchanted stick in his sword hand and a poisonous potato in his offhand (note that, according to Wolfegger, Mopyc was riding a bear at the time). Wolfegger countered with an account of a harrowing one-v-twenty that he was sure he would have won, had not Hilo/Eldritch tricked Wolfegger's TNT defense towers to fire on him, tricked Ibbish's iron golem guards to take bathroom breaks in the middle of battle, and tricked Wolfegger into thinking their inhibitor was a wooden box. That was more than Skuhoo could bear. Wolfegger had gone too far this time. For years, Skuhoo had patiently tolerated Wolfegger's antics—but not this time. “Baloney,” Skuhoo said.
Kallious went off into a corner with a TI-85 calculator, a slide rule, a Dungeon Master's Guide, and a bag of Doritos. After a bit of pondering, figuring and munching, he came back with certain proof, citing his calculations of player dexterity, armor class, dewpoint, and THACO (yes, THACO!), showing unequivocally that Elysium and New Ibbish had distinct numbers advantages in “89 of 70 battles . . . er . . . um . . . in 98 of 77 battles . . . er . . .” Looking back now, it is clear that he had made an understandable mistake of using metric instead of USC.
gabrosen, silent until this point, felt compelled to chime in, “I'm at Spawn if anybody needs me.”
Just after creating Loka's most elaborate and beautiful building interior in a few minutes, Lazuli said, “Who cares about this stupid Conquest crap? We have problems with flowers, Loka!”
Mopyc never listens to Lazuli. He taunted Wolfegger, saying that there was a huge number's advantage for New Ibbish a few battles ago when Wolfegger got sucked into Hilo via the inhibitor, with Hilo getting all of Wolfegger's stuff. All of Loka was silent for a moment. All who were on Loka at the time of that battle remembered Wolfegger asking for his stuff back and Hilo saying they only got his sword. Mopyc knew what they were thinking, and he stared through public chat with an impish grin on his face.
You Won't Believe It
Vol. 1, Friday, May 20, 2016
Controversy saturated public chat last night as Hilo, Eldritch, Ibbish and others bickered over who had numbers advantages in battles going back to September of 2015. Amid labels like “You're a two-dollar whore of a liar,” “Your momma couldn't count a stack of zombie flesh,” and “You're as bad at remembering as you are at aiming your Sharpness V, Fire Aspect II, Looting III, Unbreaking III sword [aka “Bobby'sBoogersOfPain”],” there were serious claims set down.
Mopyc stated that he won ten of eleven battles against Elysium, one versus twenty, with nothing but a Bane-of-Arthropods-enchanted stick in his sword hand and a poisonous potato in his offhand (note that, according to Wolfegger, Mopyc was riding a bear at the time). Wolfegger countered with an account of a harrowing one-v-twenty that he was sure he would have won, had not Hilo/Eldritch tricked Wolfegger's TNT defense towers to fire on him, tricked Ibbish's iron golem guards to take bathroom breaks in the middle of battle, and tricked Wolfegger into thinking their inhibitor was a wooden box. That was more than Skuhoo could bear. Wolfegger had gone too far this time. For years, Skuhoo had patiently tolerated Wolfegger's antics—but not this time. “Baloney,” Skuhoo said.
Kallious went off into a corner with a TI-85 calculator, a slide rule, a Dungeon Master's Guide, and a bag of Doritos. After a bit of pondering, figuring and munching, he came back with certain proof, citing his calculations of player dexterity, armor class, dewpoint, and THACO (yes, THACO!), showing unequivocally that Elysium and New Ibbish had distinct numbers advantages in “89 of 70 battles . . . er . . . um . . . in 98 of 77 battles . . . er . . .” Looking back now, it is clear that he had made an understandable mistake of using metric instead of USC.
gabrosen, silent until this point, felt compelled to chime in, “I'm at Spawn if anybody needs me.”
Just after creating Loka's most elaborate and beautiful building interior in a few minutes, Lazuli said, “Who cares about this stupid Conquest crap? We have problems with flowers, Loka!”
Mopyc never listens to Lazuli. He taunted Wolfegger, saying that there was a huge number's advantage for New Ibbish a few battles ago when Wolfegger got sucked into Hilo via the inhibitor, with Hilo getting all of Wolfegger's stuff. All of Loka was silent for a moment. All who were on Loka at the time of that battle remembered Wolfegger asking for his stuff back and Hilo saying they only got his sword. Mopyc knew what they were thinking, and he stared through public chat with an impish grin on his face.
But there is a thread in this section with a pic of Mopyc riding a bear (photoshopped).